Meltdowns

It's true what they say, postpartum is a hormone roller coaster. I was hot then cold, content and then teary-eyed over the silliest things. I've certainly had my moments and I'm going to be brave and share a few, some that are actually pretty funny (well, looking back on them).

Episode 1: Craig leaves for the first time, I'm on my own for 2 hours while he's at the gym.

Allison is just under 2 weeks old and we were still getting the hang of nursing. The doorbell rings and I remember the pest control guy is coming today. I don't make it to the door in time and walk outside just to see him drive away. I call and ask to have him come back... unfortunately he shows up an hour later. By this time I've already interrupted nursing enough that she's a little angry. He's explaining to me that he couldn't do the service and bill me later (like they usually do) because I'm also past due. Oops, must have been that prego brain I guess. As were settling the account little miss Allison decides to let loose the largest brownie batter poo ever. It's audible, it smells, and its running up her back... You should have seen the look on the pest control guy's face! Better yet, the look on Craig's face when he got home and saw her sleeper. We've become master stain removers although this one required bleach and an extra rinse cycle!

Episode 2: Pumping

Allison is about 3 weeks old, nursing is going relatively well, and were finally ready to introduce bottles (i.e. time for dad to help with feedings!). I'm feeling good, first pumping session yields 3oz. I debate whether to have Craig use it at the next feeding or to refridgerate it for later. Craig decides he wants to refridgerate it so he can use the bottle warmer. Yet another baby gadget he wants to try... I'm just happy he can start feeding her and go along with it. Well, a couple hours later he gets the bottle out, puts together the Dr. Brown's inserts (they're supposed to help with colic/gas), and drops the bottle in the bottle warmer. Sure enough it boils over and milk goes everywhere. I start to cry. This bottle represented a few hours of freedom for me and it just boiled over on the counter. Yep, total meltdown. Craig didn't understand why I got so upset but when you have to feed her every 2 hours and it takes nearly an hour to feed her, that leaves only 45min-1hr to eat/sleep/recover before it all starts over again. It's stressful, exhausting, and to me those 3oz represented a little independence that I so desperately needed. We learned the hard way that you're supposed to put the inserts in AFTER you warm the bottle.

Episode 3: Belly envy

Now that Craig is helping out with a few feedings, I decide to take a moment and get some sun. I start thinking about my last 2 weeks pregnant and how I would work and eat lunch in the backyard. It was great sitting outside and enjoying the beautiful AZ weather. When I find myself outside again I start to tear up because I'm thinking to myself "wow, it was so much easier being pregnant". All in all, I had a great pregnancy and at that moment I wanted nothing more than to have that belly back! I think I spent the rest of the day thinking about those last 2 weeks, how exciting (and easy) it was.

Now that she's 6 weeks old, stressing out over poo, getting upset over spilled milk (haha pun intended), and wanting my belly back are all history. I find myself with a lot more energy - she's sleeping at least one 5 hour stretch now!! - and when I see this face in the morning, it's all worth it :)